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Updated: May 3, 2022

Rejoice, because what God has for you is greater than your plans.

This is starting to make sense in my heart. For so long, I've been in a pursuit of my own idea of success, or my idea of 'making it', proving everyone wrong, proving myself that I can do it.

With each opportunity I encountered came waves of confidence, energy, and a boost that this time, things will be different, and all the plans will work out. I've struggled with discerning if the dream of becoming a physician is from God or of my own volition. There were moments where it truly felt like He was saying yes, and moments that left me confused.

The waves would brush ashore and with them came confusion, confidence, or conflict, each with its own variation in intensity and calmness.

In this wave, I see how He's been working on my heart throughout this journey of discerning my purpose. In my heart, I sense so much peace. In my head, there's confirmation that this path is better because it is not from me. It’s a confirmation that He's been preparing me for this realization and that I had to get to this point where all I want out of life is to do more for His Kingdom than the things I’ve been working toward all my life.

It’s a blessing knowing that indeed, the plans He has for me, is much more fulfilling than what I envisioned. All I look forward to accomplishing is His instructions. I don't have the full blueprint of what the rest of this life for me will unfold and that is okay. I am so content with where I am now, and where He's leading me. My desires in this world, things I've wanted to achieve in the future no longer surpass what He planned.

The waves of confusion, confidence, and conflict all came to bring this peace that others may not yet understand. It's not for them to understand but I know they will benefit from what God has for me through my obedience in Him.

For so long, I searched for my purpose, where I see myself a decade from now, or maybe 5 years, or 1 year from today, and what I'm supposed to do on this earth. I toiled with the idea that I was the master of my own life, and that I should speak things into existence, lead my way, create my own path. I fought against the waves as they came, seeing them as obstacles instead of opportunities to press on God's words and look forward to His path and His instructions.

Today, it's different.

I'm here thinking and feeling that what He's put on my heart to do is much more fulfilling and is coming so much easier than my past plans. I'm in a place where I know I'm not doing His work by myself. There's so much reliance on Him and His word. There is so much confidence, and strength and protection I feel surrounding me every time I chose His way, and this is something I don’t want to slip past me.

This must be how David felt when the Lord appeared to him and said his son Solomon was the one that will build God’s house and courts as the sanctuary. Even though David’s plans to build the temple was to glorify the Lord, God had a greater plan. David was instructed to give Solomon the blueprint and all the Holy Spirit had put in his mind to assemble, organize, and prepare for the temple. David worked, experienced the waves as they rolled in his but He was never swept by them. There’s not a single part in scripture that describes how he begrudgingly gave Solomon the blueprint of